Really? REALLY?

It never ceases to amaze me that your head can do such stupid things to you.

So, since the 7th of January this year I have:

• controlled my eating.
• changed my taste in food to point where I still like the taste of some fast food but I no longer crave it.
• reduced my weight by 24.3kgs.
• reduce my waist size from having to wear 117cm pants to now fitting into 102cm pants.
• reduced my size so that I can now fit into my 42-44 works shirts, do up the collar and wear a neck-tie without feeling like I am choking myself.
• I am exercising more and of my own choice.
• I can actually run/jog - I still get puffed but not nearly as much as I used to.
• I am sending more active time with the kids and reaping the benefits of it.

With all this in mind I get on the scales this morning for my official weekly weigh-in and I find that I am 90.5kgs (I did an unofficial weigh-in on Saturday and weighed 90kgs) and I was so disappointed.

These are some of the thoughts that went through my mind:

• I told you, don’t have lunch with Rubes today, stay inside and eat a cracker.
• You idiot, this is all because you had that piece of raisin toast when you got home from work yesterday.
• Why did you agree to have that sliver of lemon tart last night with the rest of the family?
• You are such a twit, you chose to have that banana.

What the hell was I thinking this morning?

• Lunch with Rubes?
  • I did it because I like his company, we have great conversations and I only ordered the entrée of 4 steamed dimsum.
• Raisin toast?
  • I like the taste (oh how I like the taste) and I haven’t had any in weeks.
• Lemon tart?
  • It was family home evening, we were having a bit of fun and the reward was a piece of lemon tart. I only had a small bit and Molly Lolly enjoyed feeding it to me.
• A banana?
  • It’s a darned banana you twit, get over it.

Look at what I have done in under 6 months and I come down so hard on myself for 500 damned grams? Good grief, get a bloody grip on yourself, your weight is going to fluctuate each and every day.

• If you have something with too much salt you will retain more fluid.
• If you don't have enough fibre you won't, well, you know.
• If you don't drink enough water you won’t expel the toxins and other rubbish in your body.

You can get so caught up on making sure those numbers are reducing each day that you forget what you are there for. The Duromine is helping to control your relationship with food and thus reduce your weight not the other way around (well I guess you can but it’s the wrong focus).

500 grams - so what? A good dose of fibre and 9 to 12 hours later that 500gms (and probably a bit more) will be gone.

Get a grip buster!!!